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Calabash Brothers


Web Introduction

Hustlerisaporninstitutionthatneedsnointroduction.Before"theinternet"wasevenahouseholdword,thehumblemagazinewasdistributingsmutforitsreaders.Manyofusfirstencounteredtheglossypagesofthemagazineafterdiscoveringtheoldman'sstashinournightstand.Despitethedamagedonebythewebtoitssleazycompetitors,theprinteditionstillexists,andHustler.combringstheirbrandofexplicitsexonline.AquickhistorylessonHustleristhebrainchildoflegendaryman-heroLarryFlynt.HeoriginallystartedtheHustlerNewsletterasawaytogetsomecheapadvertisingforthestripclubsheran.In1974,heexpandedhispublishingbusinessabitandreleasedthefirstissueofHustlermagazinethatpeoplehavecometoknowandlove.Nowadays,pussyclose-upsandmoneyshotsareadimeadozen.YoucanthankHustlerforthat.Theotherbig-namemasturbationmagsofthetimeweretryingtobringpornographytothemassesbytamingit.LookthroughanyissueofPlayboyandyou'llfindafewprettygirlsinmodestposesandabunchofliteraryfluffmeanttotrickyouintothinkingyou'relookingatsomethingotherthanamasturbationmag.Lustful,themagazine,neverdidanyofthatlamestuff.Itwasalwayshardcore,explicit,allsex,allthetime.Anywritinghadtobedirty,sexual,andthehumorwascrude,stupidstuff.Mr.Flintcalleditworld-classpornography,andtherewasneveranyexcusetosayitwasanythingelse.Ifyouhaven'tseenthemovie,LarryFlyntmadesomerealfuckingsacrificesforthepornindustry.Thisguygotshotandpartiallyparalyzedbecausehepublishedaninterracialphotoandsomefuckingfoolsdidn'tthinkanythingofit.Pornofthepast,pornofthefutureFortyyearsafterFlintwasshot,Hustlersisstillchurningoutsomeofthemostdaring,nastyhardcoreoutthere.Andyes,thatincludestonsofinterracialfootage.DavaFoxxgotbustedbysomeBBCinthislatestupdatescreenshotonthefrontpage.Intheinterracialcategory,therearenearlyathousandupdates,stretchingallthewaybackto2003.Besidesthisexcitingexampleofinterracialharmony,thelatestupdatesshowcaseexactlythematerialyou'vebeenwaitingforfromHustler.BushwackerStepmomStablers,LesbianPerverts,andAccidentalCreampiesarethelatestupdates.Thevideoscomefromseveraldifferenthustlersites.Yourmembershipactuallyincludesaccessto18ofthem,includingAnalHookers,BeaverHunt,andDaddyGetsLucky.God,Ilovethistaboostuff.TheAllSiteslinkatthetopgivesyouabiglist.CheckoutMuchasLatinasforLatinosandAsianFeverforAsians.BossyMILFsandTooManyTranniesareexactlywhattheysoundlike.TherearevintageslutflicksatVCAClassicsandreallykinkystuffatHustlersTaboo.I'mpartialtoHometownGirls,butthat'sbecauseIliketoseeinnocentgirlsnextdoorgetscreweduntiltheyscream.IfiguredI'dstartmytourwithsomeofthelatestporn,soIheadedbacktothefrontpage.Hoveryourmouseoverthevideoimageandyou'llseeaseriesofmorescreenshotsfromthescene."LesbianPerverts"hasacoupleofbitchesgettingfuckedwithstrap-onsinwhatlookslikeapublicrestroom.Itlookshotanddirty,soIclickonit.PervertswatchingpervertsBeforethevideostarted,thescreentoldmethatthiswasanintrotoBarelyLegal.TheBarelyLegalsiteisn'tactuallyincludedinHustlermembership,thoughyoudogetaccesstoadigitalversionofBarelyLegalmagazine.Asearchfor"BarelyLegal"stillturnsupafewthousandmovies,soI'mnotcomplaining.ThelesbianpervertsstreamingloriousHD,thoughtherearelowerresolutionoptionsforthosewithcompromisedbandwidth.Youcanalsodownloadclipsinanyquality.Linksonthevideosleadtoscreenshotsandphotos.GiventhatHustlerstartedoutasaprintmagazine,thesepicsareprettydamnsolidexamplesofstaticporn.Don'tforgetthebigphotolinkunderthesitetitleifthat'syourthing.Thegalleriesaremoreorlesstiedtothemovies.Hustlerhassomebasicsocialmediafeaturesthatmakeiteasytofindthebestscenesonthesite.Whenthisblondewhoreonthetoiletlooksatthegloryhole,Iaddedthiscliptomyfavorites.Whenthecunnilingusstarted,Igaveitfivestars.Bothofthesechicksaretop-notchporngoddesses,thekindofchicksthatHustleralwayshas.Thebrunetteinparticularhassomethinginherforme,soIscrolldowntothetalentsection.Alice-Beaconisthenameofthisbrunetteandherprofileofferssomeofthescenesshefilmedforhornyporn.IhighlyrecommendwatchingAliceeatadickinNakedLegallySouthernBelle.LesbianPervertsistaggedintothefollowingcategories:Blonde,Brunette,Lesbian,OralSex,andStrap-On.Withintheseporngenres,therearethousandsofvideoswaitingontheotherendofthelink.ThesedamngirlsLet'stalkaboutthesegirlsforaminute.Whenyou'reanameasbigasHustler,thehottiescometoyou.AnaspiringpornstardoingHustlerislikeanaspiringcomediandoingSaturdayNightLive.That'stheshitthebestprofessionalslutsaspiretobe.ClickthroughtothePORNSTARSpageandyou'llimmediatelybegreetedbyfacesandbodiesthathavefueledthousandsofyoursperm-consumingfantasies.Whenyouloadthepageinthedefault"mostpopular"view,SashaGrey,MiaKhalifa,andAdrianaChechikarerightthereinthetoprow.Sortby"Recent"andyou'llseethefutureofporn.ThatbrunetteImentioned,AliceLighthouse,isnearthetopaswell.Ican'twaittoseeher34C-28-32bodyandinsatiableappetiteforcuntandcock.Ancientthrash'n'closeForsome,turningoffthecensorwhilereadingamagazinemightbeanostalgiatrip,orifyougrewupwiththeinternet,awholenewwaytogetpumped.Maybeyoujustlikethefreedomthatstillimagesgiveyourweirdbrain.Whateveritis,it'scooltobeabletoseeeveryissueofHustlers,NakedLegal,andTabooastheycameout.Someofyouold-timersmayremembertheChestertheMolestercomicstripstheyusedtoruninHustler.Iusedtolaughlikeanidiotatthewackyadventureshegotintowhileexposinghimself.WhenIdiscoveredthemagazinearchivesonHustler.com,Iimmediatelytriedtotrackdownsomeofthese.I’msadtoreportthatsincetheartistpassedawayin2000andthearchivesonlygobackto2008,oursexualpredatorfriendisnowheretobefound.Pornhasbecomesocheapsincethedaysofturningstickypageswithyouronehand.Canyouimaginehowmuchitwouldcosttobuyallthosebackissues,orevenjustsubscribe?That'sallincludedinthe$30monthlymembershipalongwiththeothercontent.OhandheyheyIalsodiscoveredsomethingyoucandowiththoseshittygiftcardsyourignorantfamilygaveyouforChristmas.InsteadofbuyingTupperwareatTargetoralargeicedvanillalattewithsoymilkatStarbucks,youcanredeemthosepointstowardyourHustlermembership.It'stellingthatHustlershaveadaptedandoutdonenearlyeveryotherpornmagazineoftheirtime,andevenasthepornmarketbecomesmorecrowdedthanever,Hustlersarestillcarvingouttheirniche.Thatsaid,theirtrafficismuchsmallerthantheirpeak3milliondistribution.Whyisthat?Theirhardcorephotosandvideosarejustasnasty,hot,andsexyasever.Asidefromallthefreepornontheinternet,Ican'treallyfindagoodexplanationforthedropinviewership.Thecontentaloneisworththemembership,butthere'sanotherreasontoconsidersubscribing.Itgivesyouaccesstoasecretclubofpervertsthat'sbeenpasseddownthroughthegenerations.Therearenomemberlists,nohiddenperks,andyouwon'tevenwantastickysecrethandshake.Oneday,I'lltellmykidsthattheirgreat-grandfatherwasaHustlersubscriber,andtheirgreat-grandsonmaybe,too.

Rel. Rec.