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Calabash Brothers


Web Introduction

Youknowwhatmakesapornsceneevenbetter?Apairofbig,bouncytits.I'msuresomeofyoudon'tcareforthat,butforthoseofyouwholikebigtitties,Isuggestyoucheckoutmelonstube.com.It'sagreatfreepornsite,andthedomainnameclearlyindicateswhatyou'regoingtosee,becauseI'msureyouknowwhattheword"watermelon"meansinthepornindustry.Soifyoulikewatchingflatchicksdoingnaughtythings,thisisdefinitelynottheplaceforyou.I'vecomeacrossafewsitesintheirnetwork,andIcanalwaysrecognizetheminstantlybecausethedesignisthesameoneverysite.Imean,theseguyshaveabsolutelynocreativitywhenitcomestodesign,buttheydoofferhigh-qualityvideos,that'sundeniable.FirstIhavetosayabouttheireye-poppingcolors,becausethey'refuckinggross.Imean,whothefuckthoughtthatorangewasagoodideaforapornsitebackground?Areyoufuckingkiddingme?IwasblindedbythecolorthemomentIopenedthesite,butIdecidedtostayforthemassivetitstheyoffer,noquestionaboutit.However,ifyou'relikemeandjustliketobrowsepornsiteslikeanormalpersonatnight,thenyoumightfinditdifficulttobrowsethisplacecomfortably.Imean,thebackground,themenu,andeventheirlogoareallorange...Idon'tknowwhodesignedthisplace,but,lady,Ihavetotalktoyou.I'msurethissitewasdesignedbyawoman,becausethere'snowayamancoulddesignapornsitelikethis.Anotherreasonthatmakesmethinkthissiteismadebysomechickisthatyouwon'tfindvideosonthehomepage.No,no.You'llseecategories,becausewhenyouvisitapornsite,it'smoreimportanttofirstcheckoutcategoriesthatyoudon'tknowifthereareanyvideosunderthantocheckoutnaughtyvideos...That'stheirlogic(fortheidiotsreadingthis:I'mbeingfuckingsarcastic).Youhavetoselectathemebeforeyoucanwatchanyvideos,whichmeansyoucan’tjustrandomlybrowseweirdshit.Youhavetoselectathemeandthenonlybrowsethattheme,whichisfuckingstupid.IprefertobrowserandomlybecauseI’mprettyopen-mindedaboutpornandthissitewon’tletmedothat.WhenItalkaboutdifferentamateurpornsites,Itendtobeprettyhardonthemiftheydon'tofferalotofvarietybecausewithoutthat,visitorswillgetboredprettyquickly.However,I'veneverthoughtthatI'dbeintimidatedbythenumberofcategoriesandkeywordsandthinkthatasitehastoomanyofthem.Iswear,ifyoudon'tbelieveme,justgototheirhomepageandscrolldowntotheverybottom.Notonlydotheyofferatonofthemes,theyalsohaveover700keywordsforyoutobrowse.Therearesomanythemesandkeywordshereforthesimplereasonthatthereisnoneedforsomanythemesandkeywordsonasite,andthereisnotenoughdiversityinthecontenthere.Icheckedoutafewthemesthatweretotallyunnecessary...Sincethisisathird-partypornsite,thatmeansitonlyshowslinkstothevideos,nottheactualvideos.Andallthosekeywordsareevenmoremeaningless.Iguessifyoubrowseporn24/7,youmightseeallthecategories,butinothercases,thebasiccategoriesareenough.Iguessthebestthinghereisthatnomatterwhichcategoryyouchoose,therearealwaysgirlswithbigtits.Atthetopofthepageyoucanfindotherwaystoliststuff,andafterseeingalltheuselesswaysyou'dthinktheseidiotswouldmakeasearchenginewithfilters,butIguessthat'sjusttoohardforthem.Imean,theyshouldatleastallowustoselectmultiplecategoriesorkeywordsatthesametime,butthat'snotevenpossible...Youcanliststuffbydate,popularity,source,andotheruselessways.Sincethisisathirdpartysite,Ihavenoideaaboutthequalityofthevideosortheperksyougetbecauseitalldependsonthevideosyouchoosesinceallofthemarefromdifferentsites.Frommyexperience,mostofthevideosareinlowtomediumqualitywithonlyasmallpercentagebeinginHD.IfyouonlylikeHDvideos,youcanfilteryourresultsbyselectingHDsincebrowsingrandomlyisunlikelytogetyouanywhere.AsIalreadymentioned,thisisanetworkofothersites,soifthisonedoesn'tsatisfyyou,checkouttheothersitestheyoffer.Theyhavesitesthatfocusonacertaingenre,likeshemanTube,MatureTube,TubePornstars,VRPorzo,andmanymore.Butifyoulikewatchingbigboobsthatbounce,thencheckoutmelonstube.com.

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